Lonely Singles and Loneliness: When you are single, some times are more lonely than others. Holidays, crisis, anniversaries, or a sudden memory can bring feelings of loneliness to singles so strong they hurt.

  Lonely singles and loneliness:  Certain times  make many singles deeply feel the lack of a significant other, close friends or family.  

Lonely Times:
Certain Times Bring Strong Feelings of Loneliness.
By SOLO for Singles Staff

When you are single, some times are more lonely than others. Holidays, a  crisis, an anniversary, or a sudden memory can bring feelings of loneliness so strong they hurt. 

A national crisis, such as September 11, 2001, causes many singles to deeply feel the lack of closeness with another person in their lives.  

Unfortunately, some singles make poor choices as a respite from that loneliness.

Don't... 

1. Return to a bad relationship.

This is not the time to go running back to a failed marriage or a bad relationship. Even mentally reliving that relationship can make you feel worse rather than better in the long run.

2. Bury yourself in work.

This helps many singles cope for the short haul. However, it is a coping mechanism only, not a permanent solution. If excessive work continues for months, it becomes part of the problem rather than part of the solution. Work is not a permanent relief from loneliness!

Lonely Singles and Loneliness

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1. Contact your family.

But not necessarily everyone... This is a good time to contact the positive members of your family. Not Aunt Ellen with her constant aches and pains or those relatives who dwell on gloom and doom. If possible, choose the most cheerful, upbeat person in your family and make that call or visit.

2. Come closer to friends.

Friends are invaluable to a single person and their value is felt profoundly at times of crisis. 

Is this the time to contact your old friend from home or college... the one who could usually make you feel better with his/ her ability to embrace life?

3. Call on a higher power.

Prayer, meditation, and/or spiritual study help most of us to cope.

4. Volunteer.

There are many organizations that can use your help. If you can, choose a  volunteer situation which brings you in contact with other people. This is a good coping strategy for many and volunteers are always needed in times of crisis.

Do...

1. Take time to contemplate your life.

Most of us need social friends, at least one or two close friends, and a significant other in our lives. Plan an evening to take stock of your anti-loneliness network.

2. Make plans for your future.

You can use this as a wake-up call to form a "preventative-action plan" for the rest of your life!

3. Take action.

This is an excellent time to set goals, then take action, for your future. 

A social group, a lifestyle group, a dating or matchmaking service, a volunteer situation, moving closer to family, a new hobby that involves interaction with people... which of these could help you avoid the next time of extreme loneliness? 

For more information about lonely singles and loneliness, click here.