Singles: Even a touch on a hand or shoulder shows caring.
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A friends' touch is comforting. Physical gushing is as much a turn-off as verbal gushing. It repels more people than it attracts. So no one is recommending that you indiscriminately touch and hug everyone in sight. But once a friendship has grown to the point that both friends are comfortable with touching and feel they are being touched with sincerity, touching is a warm form of communication. Sometimes touching a friend on the arm communicates or just sitting and holding the hand of communicates our depth of feeling. When you need to offer comfort, extend encouragement, or express sympathy to a single friend, a simple touch can say more than any words. Men, in particular, have a hard time touching. When friendship has progressed, however, a pat on the back or a playful punch on the shoulder is acceptable to most men. A friend is someone you want to touch. When you see best friends communicating, you will notice they "listen with their eyes," stand close together, and touch comfortably. However, when you are not certain of the response to your touching, you may wonder about your friend's reaction to your touch.Again, your uncertainty is probably because the other person has not revealed enough personally to make his or her response predictable. Start with a handshake or a quick pat on the shoulder. You may find your friend initiates the next response. If not, take a chance. If the person pulls back or looks uncomfortable, you can leave the next "touching" up to them. Or wait a few weeks/months and try touching again. Just remember, friends are eventually comfortable touching. |
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